December 2008
long one
christmas was alrite, but im gettin older now so it aint as excitin
boxin day i went amys in the evenin but i couldnt stay cos i HAD to go camden the next day to get my belly checkedddddd
manu seemed abit unsure bout it n prodded it alot n it kiiiiiiiilled but he sed it werent infected which was goooood
then we all went jordans n that was funniiiiii :)
then i went edmunds n stayed there til...
“cuz i’ma murder ‘Y’, kill ‘O’ and even...”
– edmunds lover.
ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh
im so gonna fail english n psychology
ive started wearing lew’s ring again
mm
last nite was nice
-x
christmas
wasnt as good as i expected but was okay
got £150 as well as clothes, makeup, perfume
hmmmm
well tired now
these r gettin more pointless by the second!
-x
nom
last nite i got all stressed agen
dunno wots wrong wiv me
but i went n met edmund n he made me verrrrrrry happy :)
today i went last minute christmas shoppin wiv arron
missed him so much
was a nice day :)
christmas tomorrow
yaaaaaaaaaaaay :D
-x
so yesterday
i got a bit angry at stupid ungrateful people who take all they can and give nuffin back :////
but i then went n met edmund n gary n they cheered me upppppppppp :)
nice nite reallyyyy
then today i went up brookie n was meant to go amys but tht didnt happennn
ah well will see her soon i hopeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
-x
its ok now i believe
humhumhum
awwwww tim makes me smile sooooooo much
this:
THEYRE TAKING MAGIC AWAY says: you’re so much more than, like THEYRE TAKING MAGIC AWAY says: someone i want to do THEYRE TAKING MAGIC AWAY says: you’re THEYRE TAKING MAGIC AWAY says: like THEYRE TAKING MAGIC AWAY says: laurie! THEYRE TAKING MAGIC AWAY says: and i wish you were my christmas tree :(
and this:
THEYRE TAKING...
i had a reason to be nervous.
so last nite, i had 5 or 6 vodka and cokes, and a lot of strongbow n i ended up sitting outside wiv bracks throwin up all over the world :)
i was SO drunk
got on two boys ://
told wilks i liked him
cried a bloody river
and danced a lot
i was great really
lmaoooo
n now im sufferin from the worst hangover ever
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay :P
-x
i dont care what you think
as long as its about me ;)
mmm party tonite…..nervous……..bleh
-x
im sorry that i let u go-ooo
i let u down, i let u down my dearrrr
hmm basically, a certain boy i rly liked who i fort liked me turned out to be no good
prickkk
n i fink im startin to well like someone
but i shouldnt like them
n i hav no chance wiv em
n they lyk someone else anyway
n then theres lyk 3 or 4 other boys who lyk me
n my feelins r too messed up atm
i dnt no
im confused
but my belly hurts
n i need a...
omg
pain pain pain pain pain etc
it hurt ten tyms more than i fort it wud
n now i cnt sit down or bend over or walk up/down stairs or move at all for tht matter.
but it will be worth it
i hope :)
meowww i hate feelin second best
im such a selfish twat
-x
today
woulda been mine n lews 3 months :/
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww edmund keeps a diary
im on the fone 2 him
he wont let me abuse him
gettin my piercin tomorrow :)
excited!
-x
my
feelings are rather all over the plaaaaaaaaaaaace!
i think i mite like him but i think i mite like him but then i think i mite like him?
n i miss lew agennn
n too many boys r like confessin their love for me :/
n not the rite ones at tht!!!!!!
-x
oosh
i got abit angry yday lol
but lew rang me up havin some huge go at me!
what a wanker
oh well :)
i’ve been well ill today
so gay
ooh that rhymed
this is pointless
but i love cheryl cole!
and girls aloud!
:)
-x
I TRIED
I TRIED SO HARD NOT TO MAKE THIS A MESSY BREAK UP
I TOLD U I WERENT ANGRY AT U
IT AINT MY FAULT IF PEOPLE HAVE BEEN TWISTIN MY WORDS
EVERYONE THINKS UR A WANKER SO THEY R GOIN TO MAKE IT SOUND LIKE U BROKE UP WIV ME FOR A STUPID REASON AINT THEY
IT AINT MY FAULT I MENTIONED SOMETHIN AND PPL DECIDED TO IGNORE WOT ELSE I SED N FOCUS ON THAT
AND I AINT MAKIN U LOOK LIKE A PRICK, PPL HAV RELISED...
today
was gooood i bought new shorts and tights and ordered a dress for the xmas partyy
COPYCATS ANNOY ME SO MUCH
ITS MY STYLE
DONT STEAL IT.
-x
ooooh
getting my bellybutton pierced on saturday
anddddd makin a day of it wiv aimey
i love her.
and her friend sam
im sure i’ll love him too :)
media tomorrow
should be
…interesting
nite
-x
Practise.
I’ve got to thinking, thanks to my good friend Haakam.
He asked me “Do you ever get that feeling when you think you found that thing that you have been missing in your life and then once you’ve got it, the feeling is still there?”
And I said yes.
Because I understand completely what he means. We spend years searching for that one person who will fill the empty part of us...
ooer
im missin him again
told u its always in the mornin
i need to go up the cross n find somewhere to get my nails done
i cbaaaa!
mm these r so pointless!
-x
i like you
i like you i like you i like you!
but do i even?!
i like you.
i think.
SOMEONE MAKE SENSE OF WHATS GOING ON IN MY MIND PLEASEEEEE
sooo
me n aimey ended up meetin up at some point today
3? 4? loool who knows
but ye we walked around then saw nathan n we stood there tlkin for about ten years!
then we went n met edmundddddddddddd, the shy poo! :)
and then went shop
n then brookfield
it was FREEZING and bucketing down
we got soaked
was well funny tho
hmmm :)
but aimey-knows-who aint online n i wana tlk to himmmm
gay
oh...
inset day ;)
and i bloody woke up at like half 8!
then i went back to sleep and had like the best dream ever then woke up -_-
naaa im obv still in the dream
lol i well wanted to do sumfin last nite but noooo
oh well ad a nice chat wiv edmund :) he makes me laugh so much
but then my mood jus died n i started missin lew more than eva :(
i swear i only miss him when i go to sleep n when i wake up :/
how...
lol :)
today was quite funnyyyyyyy, in the common room wiv the boys takin pictures of me :| pervs ;)
love ‘em rly
had good ol’ chat wiv badman wilk n anthonyyyyyyyy:)
got abused but thats just normal now
media was poo but i kept nearly pissin myself at the boys cos they was like dyin of laughter at the telly loooool :)
art was crap too but i did an alrite paintin, i was quite proud of...
this is my past few weeks.
sixthform is so much harder than i thought it was
art is bloody ridiculous, i have to draw fruit! im not in year 7!
english i have ANOTHER essay for, as if i can be bothered!
media, well, considering what happened thursday, its pretty awful now
and psychology. well. its psychology.
me and lewis broke up thursday
he’s the only boy ive ever felt this way about
and this hurt more than...